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      04-24-2018, 05:32 AM   #1
Peasley
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Dealing with grief due to loss of family pet

I don't know why I feel the need to do this but I just do.

On sunday night my wife and I had to make the hardest decision of our lives and put to sleep our beloved dog Dave. He was a 6 year old Dachshund who over the past year had been suffering with back problems. It all started 10 months ago when he suddenly had no movement in his back end. We took him straight to the vet where he was scanned. It turned out one of his discs had exploded causing pressure on his spinal cord. He was shortly operated on by a spinal specialist and the phone call that followed suggested we keep our fingers crossed that he would recover and gain feeling back. We resisted the temptation to visit him because we knew that would be harder for him when we had to leave. Luckily one of our friends is a nurse in the vet so she would keep us updated on his progress.

He spent the following two weeks recovering in the vet. When we picked him up we were so so happy to have him back. Once home we then cage rested him for a further few weeks and were delighted that he was showing signs of improvement. We did all we could to keep him comfortable and happy.

Fast forward a few weeks and he was running around again. He wasn't the same as he used to be but he was free, happy and mobile as a dog should be.

Unfortunately a few months later we were devastated to see him paralysed again in his back end. We had been so careful to stop him jumping on and off furniture and had put a gate up to stop him going up the stairs. Another scan confirmed that another disc had exploded. The vet was happy that he had built up sufficient muscle and was confident he could be fixed again. We had to give him another chance and a second operation took place. He was cage rested for another few weeks but I would pick him up and take him outside to go to the toilet. In the evenings I would lie on the floor with him in the living room to give him fuss and company.

Up until last week his progress seemed ok. He was able to walk about, albeit a bit wobbly but he seemed happy which was all we wanted.

On Saturday his mobility deteriorated again and he was clearly in discomfort. We took him straight to the vet who assessed him. It looked like yet another disc had exploded. The spinal specialist was away until Monday so we decided to take him home on pain relief and spent the weekend fussing him. On Sunday night he started squealing in his bed and I knew this was not fair. We took him straight in and we were advised that the kindest thing would be to let him go. Deep down we knew.

Since Sunday evening my wife and I have been completely devastated. We find ourselves sitting in silence just talking about him and consoling each other. We find ourselves with an overwhelming feeling of guilt that we should have done more to help him even though we knew that putting him through it all a third time in such a short timeframe would have been for selfish reasons. Given the pattern of events it was likely that even if a third operation had been successful that it would have been only a matter of time fore his spine gave out again.

Is it normal for us to feel so guilty? Have we done the right thing? We loved our little man with all our hearts and feel so devastated that he is no longer here. The world seems a different place and the house seems to empty and quiet even though we have two other dogs.

I think I needed to write this down to help process what has happened. My wife and I are very sensitive people who don't deal with things all that well. It all just seems so unfair, he didn't deserve this.

Rest in peace my little man. We loved you more than you could ever imagine. You were my best friend and brought so much happiness to our lives, as I hope we did yours.








Last edited by Peasley; 04-24-2018 at 05:51 AM..
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